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Sunday, June 14, 2026

Thinking

 

(That sure is a big dictionary page.) Remember what I was saying last week?  "Old time radio mashup site."  

"Thinking" is a good title for this week.  It's from "The Dental Clinic of the Air", performed on a musical saw by Sam or Stan.  The program is in a collection of Old Time Radio one-shots, on the Internet Archive.  At least it used to be.  I found it just now on a new site called "Radio Echoes".

Thinking.  What do I really want to do, here?  Still want to put up something brand new and weird every week.  Not giving that up yet.  At least weird, if not new.  Perhaps more OTR.

Play (1:42)


Sunday, June 7, 2026

D-Day, with the Kingsmen

(...Maybe I should just turn this into an Old-Time Radio Mashup site.)  
 
Oh, hey, folks.  I have to say, as an experiment, this site may be reaching the end of a phase.  My intent remains to have a kind of open audio lab, with new bits tossed out every week.  But I already know, the ratio is about 20-30 hours of fooling around to 5 minutes of completed bit.  Which I've been expecting to do, eventually. 
 
But we're not anywhere near that.  It'll be a couple of years in October, since I started posting again.  Let's see if I can set up a more resilient process for the whole thing over the next three months.  If not, I might try something else for art.
 
**
 
The King's Men  
 
 
(not the band that sang "Louie Louie") were an a cappella quartet of the last century, emerging from the rich ferment of Vaudeville.  They were possibly considered a more "hep" version of Barbershop Quartet music, but that entire genre was supposed to sound corny, so they could never quite escape being associated with the moldiest of figs.  And sometimes, they sounded downright eerie.

For example, as we remember D-Day this week, June 6, 1944, the beginning of the liberation of Europe-- that evening, America tried to carry on as normal, but everyone was too nervous about whether it would succeed.  Fibber McGee and Molly substituted their regular comedy program for half an hour of patriotic music broken by news bulletins-- one of which, unfortunately, ran into the beginning of The King's Men singing Fred Waring's Army Hymn: a rare song,  a rarer rendition, missing the beginning but with enough to make one realize how differently this country went to war, in those days.
 
Til next time
-Ye Olde Farte 
 

Sunday, May 31, 2026

Electoral Collage 2024

 
It's been a couple years.  Are we used to it yet?  Maybe not.

Play (3:13)

Sunday, May 24, 2026

FDR (& Fala), Antifa


We fought a war to defeat world fascism.  I guess you could call the president of that day an "anti-fascist".  He talked about it sometimes.  If he were to discuss it today, it might go something like this... 
 


Sunday, May 17, 2026

Smokin'


From the Bandcamp collections.
 

Sunday, May 10, 2026

Elmer Davis on the News

 

 

This week's installment of Old Time Radio Ventriloquism captures the voice of Elmer Davis, attempting to craft a new understanding of The News.

play (2:23) 

 

Saturday, May 9, 2026

What is "eye-watering" supposed to mean?

I have never heard this expression until recently, and now it's in the headines a couple times a week.  "Eye-Watering Budget Projections", "Eye-Watering Scale of Scandal".  Eyes water for a lot of things- sad, happy, onions.  Aren't there better words people are already using, like "shocking"?  

It sounds like AI made it up.  Some weird concatenation of "mouth-watering", and the same body-function reaction to shock that's in so many other expressions.  But AI doesn't appreciate (or even know about) the emotional context that would cause an eye to water.  Can it ever?   

Sunday, May 3, 2026

The Bizarre Subcontext of "Wally's Haircomb"

I'll get right to the main topic: there's a Leave It To Beaver episode where Wally starts combing his hair like his mom.  
 
It's not explicit- in fact, they gloss over the whole thing with the idea that Wally's hair is done up like a dumb teenager, in the "jellyroll" style, swept up on the sides, and piled on top of the head in an inverted "U".
 
Coincidentally, his mom, June, also wears her hair swept up on the sides and kind of piled on top.  
 
Hmm.  Are they trying to make a point, here?  Well, we can certainly try.


The point of the episode (I think) is how embarrassed June and Ward are, for Wally, on his account, as he happily goes through life with hair like his mom a very strange haircut.  (The accompanying juke box jive whenever Wally's hair heaves into sight is a nice touch.  Maybe it's a fragrant pomade.)
 
 


It might be that they're concerned about how Wally's doing high-hair like an amateur; the "fallen cake" effect on top looks like June's 'do with clippers run through the middle.  
 
But even if it weren't soaked with 30-weight, the question remains:  why would their eldest son want hair like his mother?  Is it the smell of the pomade?
 

 

Sunday, April 26, 2026

Ask Your Doctor

MAD Magazine, and don't you dare forget it!


From the late 90s.  But things haven't changed much.
 

Sunday, April 19, 2026

1941 in Review

Josephine Baker

This week's feature appears to be a fragment that fell out of the film can that contained last week's feature.  
 
 
Not sure what to do about these short old-time-radio cutups.  Maybe I should just dump them on the Internet Archive like my hero, Mr. F. Le Mur. 

Sunday, April 12, 2026

Sherlock Holmes and the Voice of Stupid

 
Wherein Dr Watson quacks like a duck.
 

Sunday, April 5, 2026

Ken Nordine

 

I've got this strange idea for a story.

It's about this guy, a regular guy, like everybody else.  Except his words were too big for his head.  And it made him nervous.  (It would make you nervous, wouldn't it?)  And he tried everything to make his words smaller, so they'd fit into his brain.

He tried whistling.  He tried selling picture-window ant colonies, and Bury-It-Yourself time capsules.  He tried writing poetry about jazz.  But nothing worked.

Until one day, when he heard about this strange way of doing radio.   It seems that if you take the heebie-jeebie of Radio and mix it with the fribble-frabble of Jazz, you end up with something that takes on a life of its own.  And words tossed into this mix of dreams and electricity become huge electromagnetic waves rolling across the landscape.  Even the words which, up to that moment, had no other place to go.

So the man tried it- this "special radio".  He took the words out of his head and sent them off on their own.  And they did grow.  They started wearing double-breasted suits, and appearing in small clubs across the country, complete with a 3-piece combo (featuring cello).  There they'd take control of the stage and go on scatting wild ideas into the early dawn, with all the kool Katz and kittens caught up in the eternal now, simply snapping their fingers and saying, "Yes!...Yes!...Yes!"

Ken's birthday is April 13, 1920. And ya know what?  The Internet Archive has him covered!

I'm stunned.  "An Introduction to Stereophonic Sound"?  Thought I'd never see this outside a thrift store.  And here's the "Colors" album.  And, it looks like, all the Word Jazz albums.  More poetry, with Ringo Starr singing?  Wait a minute-

Wow.   I don't even know where some of this stuff comes from!  Here's a Taster's Choice ad...reading "The Conqueror Worm" by Poe (hope I remember to post that, next Halloween)..."Sounds in Space" ...a 1966 ad for "Top Eliminator Dragstrip Set"; I already knew Ken narrated those "ding" filmstrips we saw in grade school.  But ads, too, and for cool toys!  No wonder he sounded so familiar when I first heard Word Jazz in the 70's.  (Ok, they don't have the ads, or the filmstrip soundtrack, which we posted last year.)

This is amazing.  Thank you once again, mighty Internet Archive.  You are the mother of 10,000 things. 

 

Monday, March 30, 2026

Sunday, March 29, 2026

The Previous War

Apparently, I never posted these.  Do you think 24 years is long enough to wait?  
 
 
 
(It seems like I've been on a War Binge recently.  Actually, I'm just cleaning out my archive, until, if and when the new things are done.)


Sunday, March 22, 2026

War Concerto, first movement, by Wilhelm Zinc

 
 
Ah yes, Zinc's Magnum Opus.  Notice how carefully he weaves the musical threads of uncertainty and purpose, a mighty nation pulled up out of its own satiated ennui to embrace the task before it, and...oh, never mind.  It's actually from old "Victory at Sea" episodes.  
 
 
 
 
 
 

Sunday, March 15, 2026

Ike Pressed the Button

 

I didn't set out to make a current events bit this week.  If you're hearing any resonances with that, maybe it's just picking up what's in the air.  

Play (1:58) 

 

Sunday, March 8, 2026

Random Rerun: MacArthur vs the Flying Saucers

Hello folks.  No new audio this week.  Things are still pretty disrupted around here, and the creative sunshine didn't make it to the petri dish.  So here's a plug for Bandcamp- three(?) volumes of Cutupsound, listening is free.  This week's offering:

Play (4:44)

Perhaps a fitting finale, for our efforts here.  Hope not.

Sunday, March 1, 2026

Rommel Uber Dubbing

 Hooray, weekly posts again!  We were caught off-guard by the recent disaster. so I moved our monthly non-audio post to the first Sunday (because it's quicker to write).  

This week we look at the phenomenon of double-translation: the 2012 film Rommel, translated from German into Spanish, then re-translated by a computer into English.  Join us, won't you?








(Double-translations seem to be a promising source of Dada cutups.  Definitely want to keep exploring this...)

Tuesday, February 24, 2026

Still kicking

Three weeks without a post.  The internet router blew out and no one besides myself was interested in fixing it (including the ISP).  My apologies to everyone who thought they could reliably find strange and original audio here.  I'm not stopping until they pry the keyboard from my stiff, dead fingers.  But I can't guarantee it will happen.  Just like I can't guarantee I'll wake up alive every morning.  

So, with that jolly thought, let's get back to it.  Come by next Sunday and I'll post something, if I can.  


Sunday, February 1, 2026

William S Burroughs birthday

 
This year's piece is a setting for excerpts from Roosevelt After Inauguration, (a reading which is considerably excerpted by the author) with other pieces collected from Ubuweb.  
 
 
 
 
 

Sunday, January 25, 2026

The Elmer Davis News

This is an example of more or less "by rote" cut and paste, conducted on an WW2-era radio broadcast.  A five-minute commentary was chopped up into beginnings of sentences, ends, and neither beginning nor end.  The pieces were re-connected in random order, according to a "beginning-middle-end" arrangement.  (A couple minutes of content was lost because one of the sections ran out of pieces, which stopped the matching process.)  Minimal editing.
 
William S Burroughs did a lot of cutup like this, except with newspapers and scissors.  We'll be doing something for his birthday next week,  so this seemed at least like a kind of warm up.
 
 
Edit, 01.27: Elmer Davis V2, now with soothing white noise (3:18)
 
 

Sunday, January 18, 2026

"Watch out for that cashy soap arop!": Examples of Doubletalk



The professional voice-people who were drawn to Radio in its early days (ten years before the Talkies)  took a lot of pride in their elocution.  
 
And the demands of the new medium were for perfection.  Little wonder, then, that silliness, the antidote to too much control, quickly sprang up in the form of Bad Announcing.  

Bloopers are part of this kind of fun.  So is doubletalk: obliterating meaning with a string of word-like noises.  Which is not exactly the same as babbling. 

Doubletalk started appearing in movies and cartoons in the late nineteen-thirties. Jackie Gleason in All Through the Night, 1941:
 
 "I said the karastan on the tagabue is a very serious problem- to say nothing of the lara sang fay!"

Good doubletalk should contain articulated word-like sounds, if not actual words.  This is more difficult than muttering gutterals, like Fred Flintstone cursing-- it needs to sound coherent, while remaining gibberish.  
 
That's probably why another rule is, mix it with actual words.  The listener should be kept wondering as long as possible, is this person unintelligible or actually scrambled, in an almost Dada kind of way.  The illusion of veracity counts a lot with language, whether it's understandable or not.
 
I've assembled a few examples.   
 
The first is from a 1941 Jack Benny radio program.  Notice how Lefty weaves normal words with word-like sounds.
 
 
"Fightin' a guy inside a faucet."  You have to wonder where that came from.  Maybe this dialog is developed from some kind of Deliberate Misperception method (as used in James Thurber's "The Day the Dam Broke", "The Admiral on the Bicycle" and others), where the mis-heard phrase is fed back as dialog, unaltered. 
 
Our next example is from the cartoon,  "Fifth-Column Mouse"  (1943):



I should probably mention, the words here are no more than my attempt to cast coherence over the whole thing.  Who knows if they even had a script?  
 
Although it seems pretty necessary; in a way, it's following the same cognitive mechanics as Lewis Carroll's Jabberwocky, which hijacks the usual verb-adjective-noun structures of language to make what sense it can.  There's enough real words in there to mean...something.  If you can pull them out.  
 
It's no coincidence that most of our examples are from Warner Brothers cartoons.  This is a radio phenomenon, and Warners was closer to Radio than any other studio.  All their voice people worked in it, and the cartoons were an incessant source of catch-phrases and general show-biz lingo, as in our next example, "The Penguin Parade" (1938).
 


 
So then, they bring him back for more announcing.
 

Here's my theory: all three of these examples- the Fighter, the Mouse, and the Penguin- are done by one man.  No idea who.  I think it was this one guy in radio, who had the routine all worked out- compiling them from more coherent phrases, and writing these things.  And going on the radio with them.    
 
There might be at least one more cartoon with the same character.  The most obvious way forward would be an examination of Tex Avery's 1930s output at Warners.  Maybe more to say on this later.  

Monday, January 12, 2026

Building Code has 4 new artifacts

  
Our "Building Code Under Fire" collection has picked up four additions.  You can find it here, or through the link to the lower right.


Sunday, January 11, 2026

Frequently-confused Character Actors

 
 
No, not Grady Sutton.  That's actually what he did for a living.  
 
We're talking about actors who are similar in appearance to other actors.  Ever since that moronic Google page a few months ago, where everyone (including women) was "Roy Jenson", we've been considering the necessity of helping future generations of researchers and fans avoid some of the easier mis-identifications.  As follows:
 
 
 
 

Norman Leavitt & Guy Raymond
    This one holds a special place with me, because of my own faulty identification, years ago, on IMDB.  (It's Leavitt that briefly appears as Shelley Winters' dentist in Wild in the Streets.)
    What can you say about Norman Leavitt, Wally of the eponymous Filling Station, and so much else. 240 appearances in a 32-year career, 7 or 8 a year.  (I was watching 1948's The Big Clock last night, and guess who was there in the first five minutes, asking an expository question.)  His final gig was a gravedigger on Quincy in 1978.
    Guy Raymond is known to Star Trek fans as the bartender in the Tribbles episode.  He might be the only Old TV Guy named "Guy".   
 
 
Ed Binns & Frank Maxwell 
    Gruff guys from another generation.  Both made good army men; Binns' take in Fail Safe is downright chilling, and Maxwell was Rockford's old commanding officer in Korea.  
 
 
 
Ed Peck & Thomas Browne Henry 
    They may have looked like eagle-beaked military types, but neither of them played it much.  Peck was in the Star Trek where they go back to 1967 and kidnap a jet pilot (not the Gary 7 episode).  Henry's supposed to be an admiral in Earth vs the Flying Saucers, but he seems to be wearing Army tans.



Bill Zuckert & Stafford Repp 

    What's this?!  TWO Chief O'Hara's?  Pandemonium!  Seriously, can you tell which one was in Batman?
    It's Repp.  Zuckert got more work, though.  He was Columbo's boss in a couple episodes, random card player in The Cincinnati Kid, a judge in Perry Mason with the beatnik painter/professional cartoonist.  Had a longer career.  We're big fans of Zook's around here, because he was in Radio!


 
James Seay & Jack Warden
    This isn't a particularly common error, since Jack Warden's a known actor of the higher rank.  Still, he did a lot of TV-Guy work until he hit it big, and if you were watching the 1953 film "Captain John Smith and Pocahontas", you might think that one guy was him.  It's not.



John Forsythe & Carl Betz
    A classic example.  I'm not sure they could tell the difference in the 60s.  Forsythe was the phone voice of "Charlie" on Charlie's Angels, but that show is known for the confusion it spawned about David Doyle, who played the character "Bosley", and the actor Tom Bosley, who had nothing to do with the show. (I refer you to the Onion's story.)  Mr Doyle finally had to issue a statement.  I mean, Mr Bosley.  
 
 
 
Irene Tedrow & Anne Seymour
    You may run into trouble with these two.  A brief glance at their curricula vitae reveals they worked a lot of the same shows.  

 
 
Mike Mazurki & Max Rosenblum
On accounta the way these two gents always played lugs.

 
And finally, our own Old TV Guy avatar, Olan Soule and his doppelganger, Not-Olan Soule.
    Not-Olan appeared in at least one episode of The Rockford Files, he even spoke a few lines, but the actor was not credited.  I hate when they do that.
Olan in the 60s
     
 
    Of course, we could say that Olan was an old man by the time Rockford was on, and this younger guy would obviously not be him.  Or we might, if we keep informed by selfless free websites, like this one.  
 
     
    So, welcome to our annual non-membership drive!  May we send you a tote bag?